We all have an inherent need to belong. If you’re dating or are in a long-distance relationship and you’re being given the silent treatment, stop writing, texting or calling right away! ... How to Respond If the Silent Treatment Is Used to Punish or Control. The silent treatment is a common pattern of conflict for committed, romantic couples, and it can be damaging if left unaddressed. 7. Yes, we’ve all heard the proverb ‘diamond cuts diamond’. Consider professional therapy. The best thing to do is to remain calm and take a step back. Avoid letting the silent treatment get the better of you. Do not respond to silent treatment with silent treatment. You’re … Clearly state your boundaries. The initial pain is the same, regardless of whether the exclusion is by strangers, close friends or enemies. 3. If the person giving you the silent treatment is someone you work with, you probably can't just walk away. Respond to the silent treatment with calmness. The silent treatment is a passive aggressive manipulation tactic, but passive aggressive is still aggressive. The silent treatment, even if it’s brief, activates the anterior cingulate cortex – the part of the brain that detects physical pain. 5. 2. Except in the case of silent treatment manipulation. I’ve been the person that uses silence as a weapon and the person being stonewalled with it. It can happen between parents and children, friends, and coworkers. It is important to break this communication pattern, and there are constructive ways to respond and, hopefully, find a … Paul Schrodt , PhD, Professor of Communication Studies reviewed 74 relationship studies which involved more than 14,000 participants. One last tip: when the narcissist decides the silent treatment is over and they need your narcissistic supply again, they will do anything in their power to “suck you back in,” a move we call “the hoover maneuver.”Don’t fall for it – it’s not really going to get better, and they’re not really planning to change. You know now how to respond to the silent treatment if you’re in a committed relationship. The silent treatment happens when one partner pressures the other with requests, criticism or complaints and the other responds with silence and emotional distance. Dig deep into the reasons why, they suggest. So silent treatment is literally like experiencing physical pain. How to respond to the silent treatment. But, what if you’re only dating? The silent treatment indicates that either they don't want to talk to you or they're trying to control you. 4. If you try to meet the silent treatment head-on with aggression, you run the risk of things potentially becoming physically aggressive, which could terminate the relationship. 6. Never believe that there is a way to successfully communicate to the narcissist that the silent treatment hurts you. In both cases, it's probably best to walk away from the relationship. I had no idea that responding to the silent treatment gives the person doing it a false sense of control. 3. There are reams of articles that give you very unfortunate advice on how to deal with the silent treatment. A narcissist will react to any perceived slight, real or imagined with any punishment that they deem fits your crime, the silent treatment being a favourite in their arsenal. Take care of yourself. More than likely nothing of any significance. Dig deep into the reasons for the silent treatment. 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